This shit sucks
Okay. Being a supervisor is really, really hard when your trying to supervise people you've been working with for over a year or a couple of months as a regular employee. They don't take you seriously. They're so used to like...not viewing you in that kind of role that they dont listen to you.

Like, today for example....

I feel really bad about this, though. But i just kind of snapped on him. I was closing with my coworker Ryan, and its the supervisors job to close the store (everything to do with cash) and the other persons job to do the last little cleaning tidbits (usually vaccuming, taking out the all depends on how slow the nights been. A lot of times supervisors will take out the garbage because theres nothing else to do an hour before closing. Hell, I remember a time when I closed AND cleaned the entire store) So me and Ryan are standing around discussing how we're going to get this store clean before we close it so we can get the fuck out as soon as possible.

And basically anything i said he just talked right over like it was the dumbest idea ever.

Me: Okay, its nice and slow so you can do garbages now-

Him: Why? I can do them in like a second, I'll do them before we close.

Me: Ah...right, okay, fine. So, do hangars right now so we get it out of the way, i doubt anyone is going to buy anything-

him: Why?? That takes a second, i'll just do it when i go upstairs.

Me:....right. Well, mop the floor now then.

Him: In a second, i'll do it after i blahblahblahblah

Right, and so on. This part i didnt mind SO much. It was when I, as a fucking supervisor, asked him straight out to do something and he totally refused. It was like...30 minutes till closing and i asked him to bring up the hangars. He said why, he'll do it when he brings up the tills. Fine. I ask him to bring out the garbages. He gives me a look like im retarded. He says "ookaay, but now its going to be a waste of a bag because you made me collect the garbages before and now im putting a new one here and tossing this one when i could haveblahblahblah". Like...i dont give a flying fuck if your 'wasting a bag'. Those fucking rolls have like a hundred bags on them. So, he does it, comes back five minutes later and LITERALLY gives me this look that says "DUH. SEE. I was right, look how fast I did it."

I DONT CARE! I WANT THEM DONE *NOW* SO DO THEM *NOW*! At this point, I was getting mad.

Ten minutes later, there are no customers in the store, im half done closing the terminals, i ask him again to bring up the hangars and he decides no, he'll mop the floor instead. Fine. He mops the floor, the store is going to close in FIVE MINUTES, i want these hangars done right now because if not we have to do them on our time which delays me getting the fuck out. he says wait, i'll do them when i finish folding clothes on the shevles, which he is doing at a SNAILS PACE. I finally get seriously pissed and decide that this guy has got to stop fucking not doing a single thing i tell him to. So, the store closes, I finished with the terminals, ive called my boss with the total, and guess what? THE HANGARS ARE NOT DONE. I thought to myself "i swear to god if i end up doing these things myself after i asked him three times to do them im going to fucking snap."

yah. guess what happened? THATS RIGHT. *I* DID THE HANGARS! Right. And i snapped.

So, from that moment on I gave him the ultimate cold shoulder. Like, one word answer, dirty looks, get-the-fuck-away-from-me kind of cold shoulder men dread. Finally, when we've stepped out of the store, ive locked the doors, he turns to me and quietly says:

" there something wrong?" As if he's sensing impending doom. Right. Well...this is the part i regret. Maybe i should have said it a little less...authoratively. Or bitchy. but i said:

"Ryan. When i tell you to do something...DO IT."

He gave me this shocked stare and said "...what?"

I basically told him i was NOT happy about the fact that i ended up doing something i told him to do. he tried to argue his case, i basically said it didnt matter, i told him to do it and he refused. it became awkward. I tried to lighten it up by asking happily what direction he was going in, and upon realizing it was the opposite, bid him a good night and turned to leave.

That boy probably thinks im totally insane. I am just dying to go to work tomorrow and talk to my fellow supervisors and see if i was right or if i snapped for nothing. I want to know if people constantly refuse to do what they tell them to do also. I want to know if i am expecting too much. I have NEVER refused to do what they've told me to do. "Maria, can you do hangars?" "Sure!" "Maria, its 8:30, take out the garbages will yah?" "Yah, no problem."


(no subject)
Woooo mah journal, how i have missed theeee.

well, not really.

Why the fuck can't I seem to sleep past 9 am anymore. I must have caught up on all my lost sleep both times i slept till 12 when i went to sleep at like 1 ^_^. Whatever, gives me more time to hang around and do nothing, which i dont really have time to do anymore. I SHOULD have taken the time to work on my portfolio, but....meh.

I dont wanna go to woooork. Mainly because I have to meet Luis after work and i dont wanna do that. I was looking forward to it yesterday, but today...not so much. I just hope it isnt awkward. Crap, it wasn't even a REAL argument. Luis was just being a typical guy, point blank refusing to tell me what the fuck was up his ass when he KNEW i knew something was wrong. When i finally managed to squeeze some info out of him, his VERY girly response was:

"Well, you should have known what was wrong anyway!"

Dude. I feel like a lesbian when he acts like this. He just gave me the "i shouldnt have to tell you, you should know whats wrong!" line that chicks are supposed to throw at guys whenever they're huffy. I always knew i was the pants of this relationship, but woooo, thanks for proving it big boy!

I dont WANT to be the pants ;.; I want to be the chick! THE CHICK SHOULD HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE THE CHICK! SHYT.

I dont know what to think anymore. I dont like him that much. I dont. I dont know why, seeing as he's very sweet and very nice and all that jazz. And its so hard to find nice guys these days...nice, CUTE guys. He is cute. And nice. Which is the main reason why i havent broken up with him yet.

...that and im scared shitless. I am no heartbreaker. I dont wanna do it!

And im scared to go into animation single incase scary nerds attach themselves to me.

What to many people have already given me sound advice, and i know what i should do myself, but i just cant bring myself to do it. Ugh. Where is the man of my dreams? COME TO MEEEE!

Wee fun!

The very detailed Perfect guy survey

Created by Jazzbunny and taken 2483 times on bzoink!

His Look:
Name:Geeze im not THAT friggen picky!
Hair Colour:Not that picky either!
Hair Style (long, short, bowl cut, cornrows, etc) :soccer player hair -like, just above his shoulders but layered. Mmm.
Eye colour:doesnt matteerrr.
Age:older then me??
Height:taller then meeee.
Size:well i guess 6 inches is average right? >)
Body build:toned is fine, muscles are really nice, but not overly muscled. thats nasty.
Ethnicity:ummmm...doesnt matter, but i have to admit im not that into asians or blacks. not being racist! its just what i find attractive.
Glasses?umm..preferably not, but if he's sexy he'll look sexy in glasses too.
Piercings?FUCK yes. earrings. guys look hot in earrings.
Chest hair?umm, no thanks. i want to date a stud not my dad.
big ol booty? or no?medium sized..?
His Mind
in school?YAH. DUH.
what does he want be/do when he grows up?umm..something with money since i'll be starving. Engineer :D
Can he speak another language, if yes what?something sexy like REAL french.
Can he read music?nah.
Can he read guitar tabs?HECK YUS!
Can he play guitar?YYYEESSS!
the drums?sure!
some other instrument?blah
Can he write music?if he wants to :D
Will he write songs about you?no because thats creepy.
Will he write poems about you?still creepy.
Will he be artistic in some way?NO. leave that to me, please. just guitar for my baby.
Will he "blind you with science?"...what???
His Style
Party hopper or stay at home?party hopper. well...wait we have to be opposites. okay somewhat of a hopper.
Straight A student of Drop out?oh, gee, this is a hard one...
Does he have a best friend?sure.
is it you?well YAH. but he needs a best guy friend too, you fucking moron.
Is he straight or bi?...straight. bi just means more people as potential cheaterees.
Religious? what type?, but not overly religious.
Virgin? till marriage or till "the rite time"?umm...he doesnt have to be a virgin, but he isnt going to be a big fucking man whore like most men are.
Should he be able to bake or cook?bake!! what would be SO CUTE.
Is it okay for him to have a lot of gal pals?sure. as long as they arent nasty whores.
Out-going or shy?:out going. i dont know what i'd do with a shy guy.
Should he watch chick-flicks?:no because he'd watch them alone.
Would he be a smoker?:NO.NONONONONO.
cursing?sure, i do :D
does he play football(US)?
basketball?yaaah :D they usually have really nice bodies.
rugby?thats okay
golf?UMM NO.
does he drag race? NO! NOOO FUCKING WAY!
does he have a "pimped up" ride?....a normal car is fine.
Can he surf?YES!
snowboard?too dangerous
Would he have an accent?
Anything else?HE HAS TO DRESS LIKE SPIKE! *drools*
You and Him *last part!*
Does he kiss on the first date?:N.O.
Where does he take you?hmm...somewhere no cheap and retarded?
Does he pay?yes! no matter how much i beg to split it!
Would he lay under the stars with you and spout random philosophies?lay under the stars, yes. random philosophies, not so much.
Would he use endearments?sure, but not stupid ones. if he calls be 'baby' i'd punch him. 'love' is really cute.
Would you hold hands?sure!
Would you ever stay the nite at his place?the first date? wtf do u think i am?
Would he give you flowers/candy or a big expensive or candy.
Would he walk you to your door at the end o the nite?sure
How would he propose?something...unique, but not exspensive. something with meaning. like...proposing where we met, or something.
Lastly, after you meet, get hitched, etc. What do u name your kids? HAHAHAHAHA!

Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink!

well. that was interesting.

(no subject)
He gave me a v-day present...


How the hell do you tell someone you dont like them without sounding like a total bitch? How do you give someone the 'lets just be friends' like without crushing them into the dirt?

...its impossible, isnt it?

FUCK. This situation would be nonexistant if life was just a LITTLE less of a bitch. You like someone but, of course, their FRIEND likes you instead. And when a persons friend likes you, you are like a disease to that person. Totally untouchable, danger zone. Unless they arent close friends, which these two are.


Ahhh this is going to make school hard. Thankfully i only have two classes with him. But...its gonna be so awkward. I have to throw the word 'friend' at him as much as possible. I'll give him the hints that hopefully i'll never have to officially shoot him down. Cause he's a really nice guy and fun and funny...but i only see him as a friend. That and i am not attracted to him at all. But yah...UGH.


Wow, old people are so ignorant.
Okay, so i was eating breakfast, minding my own business, i'd only had like...two sips of my damn coffee and my grandmother tosses this sheet she gets from church onto the table infront of me. She says 'read the part about marriage' and i figure 'oh, its in english, so maybe she doesnt understand it'. So i read it, and it was only a small paragraph, and it reads something like this:

Help keep the real definition of marriage. You should have a hand in helping your perish. Contact your Prime Minister through the addresses below and keep our faith strong.

or some shit like that. And i was still sleepy so i actually understood the opposite at first. then i reread it and noticed the 'real' part and was like '...this is against gay marriage, isnt it? pft, fuck them, i'll send them an email telling them to lighten the fuck up and let them get married'. So i was just going through what i'd say in my head when my grandmother enters the scene and sits down and says 'so, did u read it?' and i said 'yeah...' and she was like 'so are you going to mail them?' and i said 'no.' and she said 'why???' and i said 'because i think they SHOULD be allowed to get married. Maybe not in the catholic church, because you cant expect a religion to change its views just for them, but the government should let them get married.'

...and...i should have just said yes.

I was lectured for like...30 minutes. Which isnt surprising considering who it was, but like...i just didnt need that 5 minutes after i woke up. And i wasnt listning to half of what she said because some of it was pretty ignorant. I'm not changing my views because she believes being gay is a sin. i think the convo went something like..

G: No, you're wrong, in the bible it says marriage is between a man and a woman, two men or two women is a sin!

Me: then why are there gay people?

G: *sighs* marriage is for reproducing and making a family, gay couples cannot have children!

Me: They can adopt.

G: *gives me a dirty look* what do u think those children will go through when they grow up? they will ask 'where is my mommy?' or 'where is my daddy??' its not right!

Me: *groans and tunes her out*

G: *babbles on for another 20 minutes*

Me: oh, look at the time...i have an hour and a half before i start work, time to leave! *bolts*

There was just no point in arguing with her. With anyone else who wouldnt sit me down and lecture me, i am 100 percent positive i could win a debate about that issue. i already sort of did. i did a 2 minute oral presentation on it, and i struck everyone speechless. no one had anything to say after i did my speach. but with her...its like it hits this...wall of ignorence built up by years of 'this is the way it goes'. and i was like...30 minutes early for work! when i told my coworker the story, she laughed and said 'well no wonder you were so early! You wanted to get the fuck outta there.'

Ugh...why are people so anal about it. Dont they understand that gay people are people, too? They dont even know how hard it must be for them, to not be able to tell anyone, people who are supposed to love you no matter what like your parents, friends and grandparents. How horrible must it feel to be scared that with one sentance, someone who says they love you will look at you in disgust, and possibly throw you out of the house and their lives? It makes me want to fucking puke. If its so fucking wrong why is it there at all?? Why are people gay and have been gay for hundreds of years? WHY WHY WHY? Its still love! I thought marriage was joining two people together who love each other. Why the hell cant they experiance love and marriage, just because their soul mate happens to be the same sex as them? Fuck all you damn homophobes, shit.

OH! And one more mother fucking thing, now that im all pissy about it. NOWHERE in the bible does anyone of any fuckin importance say that gay people arent allowed to get married. I searched and searched and searched. Some...profit apostle dude says something like 'the act of gay whatever is a sin', which basically means they arent allowed to fuck. But that said nothing about marriage or love AND who gives a fuck! Who the hell is that dude? I dont know! He isnt Jesus and he isnt a burning bush so who fucking cares what he says! HA!

At school again-woo!
I swear this class is journal writing time. I love it because i can get the labs done so quickly, then i can get home all early to do....homework? :D Well, nothing usually. But hey, im at home and have the OPTION of doing whatever I want, therefore it is better then school :D

Aaaand WTF how come this stupid, blond bimbo bitch gets to go out with Luis aaaand i am having no luck? Where is the justice? Is he into stupid, bitchy blond bimbo's? Beecause if he is that is a major turn off right there :D Well they only went out for two weeks because...well, she's a stupid blond bimbo bitch. But still. Bitch.


Man and i gave her the benifit of the doubt, too. How does someone as cynical and people-hating as me give a chick who comes to class dressed like she's going clubbing the benifit of the doubt? Cause last illustration class i was talking to Kyle and i dont know HOW we got on the topic of this chick, but i remember him saying "i bet she's a big bitch" and i remember saying "Aww, kyle, you dont know that for sure. Looks can be decieving."

well apparently not, maria. apparently not. And we both bet she can't draw worth crap. She looks like she belongs in fashion design or something, not art fundamentals or animation. Maybe even graphic design. BOO BITCH GO TO FASHION!

Yah in a bitter little cunt, arent i? :D

But she totally deserves it because she's a racist little hoebag! she doesnt like our stylistic drawing teacher because he's jewish. How fucked up is that? I wonder if she even LOOKS at Tony...she must snub his ass like crazy. (tony is black, incase you were wondering.) I hate racist people...get over your fucking selves!

Lesse what else can i ramble face is starting to hurt. The radation this screen is pouring out into my skin is staggering. Which is weird because its flat screen. Arent those supposed to be all good and not-killy with the radiation? HMMM? Guess you just cant win with technology.

And WHY is it snowing? Make it stop snowing!! The snow just started to go away, more isnt supposed to come! Fuck this country sometimes, honestly...

And im all sad because i couldnt eat my brocoli because the shit didnt have anything on it. i dont even know if i was supposed to take it. i just saw brocolli in a container in the fridge and said 'gee this might be for my lunch!' so i took it. but it had no dressings on it at all. so now i have a half eaten brocolli lying in there. i think i might buy something from the caf, im sure they have salad dressing or something.

Okay and this person bashing Gambit on this X-men 3 site is pissing me off. Supposedly Gambit will not be in the new x-men movie because 'his powers are too similar to cyclopse and his personality is too close to wolverines'. Yah,well fuck you bitch, that is why he is COOL. And i wasnt aware there was a rabid fanbase of ANTI gambit freaks. When did this happen? Why would you not like him? They are probably all men. So, either Gambit will have a small, insignificant role, or he just wont be in there at all. Instead, we're getting 'beast', which i knew would happen. I was really surprised that he wasnt in the first or second ones. And can they please work on making Rogue kick ass like she does in the comic and cartoons? I'm sick of this pathetic little chick whose actress annoys the living fuck out of me. WHY did they cast her!? Did anyone notice how she lost her 'accent' half way through the first movie?? Thank god Wolverine is hot and cool or else i'd be very mad about all the movies being centered around him.

(no subject)
Im in schooool even though i almost died at work yesterday. I had no idea i would get that sick in under 24 hours. I mean, i felt kinda crappy monday night, but not so bad that i'd be dying on tuesday. And of course i couldnt call in sick because a)my hours have gone down big time so i couldnt afford it and b)they wouldnt be able to find a replacement so one of my managers would have had to stay the entire night, which would have pissed them off even though i could have been so sick that i was in the hospital. Do they think I enjoy sitting at home and feeling like someone is microwaving my body while sticking thousands of tiny needles into it at the same time? And sending every fucking booger in my nose down my face like a mudslide? No. I dont enjoy that.

So yah, im probably going to get yelled at by my loving, considerate boss for hardly doing anything yesterday. Well excuse me for almost passing out. I tried to do things, I really did, if not to make a good impression then for my own sanity, because walking around a dead quiet store for 4 hours doing nothing sucks. So i tried to scan all the sweatpants on the shelves, because we have to rescan the entire fucking store to make sure everything works properly, but everytime i would take a giant pile of pants down i would get hot/cold and sweaty and dizzy and it just sucked. So i pawned the job off on my supervisor and folded clothes instead. But folding clothes in a quiet store takes like...10 minutes, so then i had nothing to do. So i just...tried not to pass out.

Hahaha people in my class think im chatting XD they feel sorry for whoever is going to get that mass of text i just typed. Silly fools do not understand the concept of Live Journal.

...and that geeky guy who is scarily obsessed with batman is annoying me with his annoying laugh and his annoying batman talking and his annoying geekiness. I think if he ever had the chance he would so do batman. it freaks me out. he probably dresses up like batman at home and pets himself. You have to meet this guy to fully understand his scary obsession.

hahaha, grilled cheese is so hardcore XD What a loser.

(no subject)
Honestly, with all the practice im getting, i should be hired as a couple shrink...


I'm fucking getting sick again. this fucking sucks. Now i have to go to school and sit in 3 hour classes sniffling like a fuckin loser. Who got me sick?? I'll KILL them...

But im so happy cause i bought MARS and i cant stop reading it. I have like...13 volumes and im going to finish all of them in less then a week for sure if i dont cut it out. But its just so...GOOD! GAH. 130 bucks...yikes. oh well. now i'll always have them ^__^

I don't think im going to get married. I've come to this conclusion based on the fact that ive never had a boyfriend (Vlad does NOT count that was NOT even a week and i didnt wanna go out with him!) and i'm almost 19. Well. Thats just fine. I've had enough relationship from all of Andrea's relationships. I'm sick of boys already and i havent had one of my own yet. I want Rei from mars, thats who i want. Such a fucking sexy bitch.

I think its me. I mean, i can never like a guy long enough to want to go out with him, or like him enough. Like there's...3 guys in my program so far who i thought were pretty cool. One of them was hot so i talked to him, found out he acts like my brother, then quickly decided to be friends only. The other one i started to like as i got to know him, but I don't LIKE him. I just like him. He's nice and kinda cute, funny, sensible, and he's serious about school. then the other guy i just met and i dont know if i LIKE him either, but I like him, and he's pretty cute and funny and sensible and talented and really nice cause he helps everyone :D he's someone u bring home to mommy. And he's going to get into animation for sure because he just kicks ass. But damnit. Blah. BLAH.

i feel so dirty...OH! AND GUESS WHAT! im drawing smutage! XD its a work in progress right now, but i decided to just to see if i could pull it off. If i do, i shall be so very proud. And so will kris XD. cause she likes smut. my friends will never let me hear the end of it, though. WELL YOU GUYS ARENT SEEING IT!!

Woo hoo im social again!
Man, i've become such a hermit XD I think it's because i no longer have a metro pass and i dont feel like going so many places that i have to rebuy bus tickets three times a week. but anyway :D I got dragged to a get together at my coworkers boyfriends house, and at first i didn't want to go because i wouldn't know anyone and i wasnt in the mood to feel all awkward with the inside jokes and whatnot (and im a hermit. she taunted me and called me antisocial. i took that as a challenge). But her boyfriend blackmailed me into going, cause he always drives me home when i close with her so he's like "get your ass over here or you wont step foot in my car again!" So, since i like my rides, and im also thankful for my rides, i went :D And had lots of fun :D and got drunk :D

SO! Thus concludes my night. and i missed when two guys took huge wipe outs on the ice!! Damnit! the one time i didnt go outside and thats when they fuck up. and supposedly they were both really funny, too! Like, the first guy was singing and dancing and walking backwards when he took a flip, and the other guy was walking, slipped, fell backwards, and kicked a giant poll of wood that was lying on the floor which flew up and landed on him. DAMNIT!

And we had lots of junk which is making my stomach do weird things today. Like, they had a giant bag of Jelly Belly jellybeans, which everyone INHALED since its so much fun to guess which flavor you just popped into your mouth. Except when u get the nasty ass Buttered Popcorn one, or the black liqorice one that tastes like sambuka which i know i spelt wrong so fuck you. And one of the girls made this kick ass cake loaded with all sorts of junk, namely M&M's, Marshmellows, Caramel, and...something else. GOD it was good...

So yah. that was my socialness birthday :D which is in two months. I'm such a freak. But shit, seriously, i dont have time. My portfolio is due in under a month and im not done it yet...i havent even applied!!! I am so seriously ruined. Blah. Whatever. OH! and i dont have a hangover. I love my body.

Oh coach carter, your my hero!
I swear i could buy a shirt with how much it costs to see a movie these days...

anyway! :D Went to see Coach Carter tonight, much to my surprise. That's what I get for going with Ivy. Anyway! It was a pretty good movie. Got a touch teary eyed like...twice. But it wasnt touching enough to make me cry. Probably because the plot has been done so many times that i know whats going to happen next. Except the ending. It was much more realistic than most movies, probably because it was based on a true story. Lossa drama.

But for a movie that had some really good stuff in it, like...all of what coach carter said, they sure had a lot of stupid things in it that made it funny. Like...the random asian dude who would show up once and a while on the team. And the even more random trashy white dude who would show up even less.'d have the basketball team at practices, in the library, hanging out on the street, and no asian and white dudes. Then, at a basketball game, you wont see The asian dude the entire game and suddenly he'll show up in a group huddle and yell 'go oilers!' or whatever and then dissappear for another 30 minutes, then reappear at a random practice then never show up again till the end of the movie where he sits on the bench and is included in one shot, then dissappears forever. And the trashy white dude was in one shot for surprisingly more then a split second, then he was never seen again till the end of the movie even though there was like...3 games in between. Like...if your going to have them in the team, give them a line or two! Or let them at least HOLD the ball! Or keep them CONSISTANT! Everytime i saw the asian dude in a shot i'd laugh.

And there was this guy on the team who would have THE most pathetic expression on his face at all the dramatic moments, and instead of making people teary eyed it would make them piss themselves. This movie was not a comedy and it had the theater roaring with laughter every ten minutes.

But, besides that, it had some nice moral points and all that shtuff. nothing no ones seen before. yah. i wanted to see A Series of Unfortunate Events ;.;


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